About the princess thing

Happy Birthday, Kulani!


Three years ago, you were born in a small village in Ethiopia. Most of the time,

I don't think about the circumstances of your actual birth at all. But when I do, I freak out a little. There were 100 million things that had to go exactly right for you to be right here, right now with us. It just seems impossible. And it's scary because the thought of ever being without you is unimaginable.


Kulani, you have an effect on me that no one else has ever had. It's amazing really. But it's a feeling--it's not a thing. When I am with you, I feel like you are reaching into my heart and opening it up. I can actually feel my heart swell up and then open. I don't expect it to happen. I even forget sometimes that you have that effect on me. Like a few days ago, I came home from a terrible day cursing and tripping over shoes and toys and there you were, just standing in the kitchen looking at me. The feeling happened. That feeling. My heart swelled up. The shoes and toys became a little less annoying (as instruments of my personal and continuing affliction by clutter). Kulani, in my life, no one else has ever reached into my heart and opened it up exactly the way you do. That feeling is exclusive to you.

But this letter is not about me. This letter is about your birthday. You are three years old today. So here we are in Southern California on your birthday, hanging out in a place where princesses hang out. And you love it. And I love it because you love it. And the whole thing is way more fun than I thought it was going to be.

On the princess thing... The princess thing has nothing to do with beauty or class or charm (you have all those things too, of course, but they have nothing to do with princessing). That is not what this is about. Being a princess, when done correctly, is about something inside. Something precious. Something I see in you. There is a great deal of responsibility involved. This is especially true in your case. You have unique gifts and talents that this world desperately needs. Your life has a meaning and it will be amazing and you have a lifetime to figure it out.


P.S. You don't actually have to be a princess. It is optional. There are lots of cool things you can do and be. But you will always be a princess to me.